Potty Learning Time?

About two weeks ago, John started giving me a sound kick to the ribs everytime I tried to change his diaper. Consistent discipline didn't deter him, and a warning as I picked him up onto the changing table only encouraged him ("Remember, you'll be disciplined if you kick Mommy," was followed by a WHACKKKK straight to the ribs). I told a friend about this at church on Wednesday night and suddenly the light went on. John doesn't WANT to be in diapers anymore!

Something similar happened about six months ago. John was consistently throwing food from the high chair. Warnings (like above) and discipline were totally ineffective. We moved him to the table on a booster seat, gave him a normal plate and silverware, and the food stopped being thrown.

So, after considering this Thursday, I put him in underpants on Friday afternoon. He had NOT ONE accident until Daddy came home, at which point life was too exciting to bother with the potty. He's done fine today (2.5 hours). He can pee on cue, though we haven't had a poop yet. He peed in the potty five times yesterday, three times today so far. I'm worried he'll have an accident so I offer the potty about once an hour! The first time it took him about 5 minutes, now it takes about 1.

The speech therapist comes every Monday. I am learning things, but I also notice that John's behavior is worse when she is here. For example, he throws his toys every time she comes. She has given me "strategies" for dealing with toy throwing, but he doesn't throw toys if she isn't here. I'm not sure if it is because bad behavior like toy throwing means I just put him down for a nap immediately or because her desire to talk about everything he does encourages toy throwing.

If John threw a toy when she wasn't here, I would say, "No, we don't throw toys. You probably need a nap." End of it. No more toys get thrown for days. (He has thrown one toy once in the past week - it was in the afternoon after she was here. When she is here, he might throw ten things before he calms down.)

When the therapist is here, she says, "John, toys don't fly. Can you find something that flies? Airplanes fly! Birds fly! Toys don't fly." John might say, "fff," and that would be rewarded with a response of, "FLY! That's right, toys don't fly!"

Well, that toy DIDN'T fly; John threw it. It was John's fault, not the toy's!!!

On the other hand, she has had a few suggestions that have been helpful. John's nose was running and I had a wash cloth within reach. I grabbed it to wipe his nose and he started crying and turning away. She told me that John recognizes that a washcloth is for washing, not for nose blowing. She grabbed a tissue, held it up to his nose, said, "Blow, blow, blow," and that was that. I've consistently used that "method" since then without a single fight.